Some Mom Thoughts + Two Videos

Izzy turned 7 months old last week. How did that happen?! I know I always say this, but time really flies by with a baby, especially when there are two older siblings around. I still vividly remember going to the hospital at 4am and the birth story that followed, and the morning Z and N came to meet Izzy for the first time in the delivery room. Both of them were instantly in love. Neither of them were the jealous type, and they just took her in like she'd always been one of them. It's really sweet. Zoey helps me out with Izzy so much, and is always so gentle and considerate to her needs. Naynay never forgets about Izzy either. No matter what he's doing, he always checks up on her here and there, and makes sure that she isn't left alone and has something safe to play with. I cannot be more thankful for these two little angels of mine, because of them, my own adjustment as an exhausted mother of three has been much smoother than I could have ever expected. It's funny, but I am getting teary-eyed as I'm typing this :) Time goes by so fast, not just with Izzy, but with Zoey and Nathan too. I feel like they have also grown SO much in the past 7 months! 

I know this is an old video, but it is hands down one of my all-time favorites. Here Izzy was 3 days old. Naynay was 2.5. He was singing Amazing Grace to Izzy in his poor English :) At the end I was telling him to blow a kiss to Izzy and that he can't kiss her (he must have been sick or something) and I love how he ended up just cupping her face. Haha.

One another note // 
Once in awhile, I'd have some really sweet and dear people tell me that I seem like a wonderful mom. And to be completely honest, I am far from being a wonderful mom. Some days I struggle with anger, negative emotions and frustrations over the little accidents, mistakes, and tantrums that come with a normal mom life. And some days, I constantly feel a lot of guilt. But one thing I've learned and have been trying to do is to give myself and my kids more grace in our daily lives. While I'm on this learning curve to be a level-headed, God-fearing mom, they are learning to grow up and be little humans too. At age 3 and 5, Z and N deserve more credit, acknowledgement, and patience from me. I know that very well, but it's not always easy to live it out. But praise the Lord, I am deeply humbled and reminded of his love whenever I think about my relationship with Him. He has had endless love, patience and grace for me, and will always have. That really helps put everything in perspective for me, and in turn, it gets easier to stay calm and not sweat over the silly little things (even though at heated moments, nothing is silly or little :)

One more video before I head to bed. I shared 15 seconds of it on Instagram a few days ago, but I really wanted to put the full version up. Last night, Zoey was using her silly deep voice to say "daddy fell asleep" in Mandarin, and it just cracked Izzy up! She loves her big sister so much lately; she smiles and laughs so easily whenever she sees Zoey.